The Misadventures of Ruri Kurosaki and Her Traveling Band of Emo Birds
by KrysImeteriHikari
Summary: "Academia may have greatly broken us, crippled us beyond repair, but we are never going to give up. We're going to get Heartland back. They can take all they want from us, but they can't break our spirit. Heartland will live on, forever! No Fusion scum bastard is going to take that away from us, ever!"
1. You're Going to Miss This

It feels so weird, using a pen and paper to do something like this. I didn't even know stuff like this existed anymore. I never was big on writing in a diary or anything before, but…

Well, it's a pass time, anyway. And it beats staring at rubble all day. And some junk about preserving history or whatever for someone to read this should it be found if I leave it somewhere or whatever. Blah Blah Blah.

In case I forget it, my name is Ruri Kurosaki, former fifth year student at Heartland's elementary school. If things had been different, I'd probably be in middle school by now, probably a third year, right on my brother's heels. He'd probably be a first year in high school by now. He's certainly got the height for it. The high school uniforms were so cool back then! Wish I could have seen him wear it at least once...

That does remind me that on the next supply search mission, to see if I can find him another pair of pants. His ankles are starting to show again and I think he's kind of embarrassed about it. That and the pair he has I don't think can handle another patch to cover his other patches. And I need to remember to look for more blankets and jackets since fall is coming soon. Who knows how fast it's going to get cold this year. Last year was brutal and who knows if we'll be lucky to find permanent shelter this year too. Hope those Fusions scum bastards don't find us again, or smoke us out like last time.

Oh, am I supposed to swear in this thing? Any old holobook would have deleted that immediately. But, this isn't a holobook, after all. Hope my brother doesn't find out I've been swearing. He'd freak out so much!

Though the look on his and Yuuto's faces when I did that one time…

I was really pissed off at the time, okay? And it just sort of… slipped out. I think I stunned all of them. Yuiko thought it was funny though.

Who's Yuiko? Well… she's one of the other girls in the group. She was in my brother's class before…

Well, before everything happened, actually. I don't even know if there's enough paper in this thing to explain about back then. Guess that's another thing to add to the list of things to try and find on the next supply run mission: More of this… paper stuff, some blankets and jackets, and some new pants for my brother. At least this thing is good for keeping lists.

But, I probably should give at least some info about what happened. History is written by the winners or whatever, right? And I don't want those fusion scum bastards to mess with our history, what really happened that day, three years ago.

What happened… was horrible. A day that changed a lot things for all of us. Me, my brother, Yuuto, all of us.

It had started off normally enough. The teacher, Mr. Himura, was asking us to read aloud from our holobooks. I dreaded reading aloud days back then. It wasn't like I hadn't studied it beforehand. I read it aloud at least a hundred times at home, practicing. My big brother, Shun, could attest to that, him knocking on the wall at random intervals to tell me I was being too loud. Either that or it was to correct me. Or he would tell me about more advanced dueling theories even though I was only in elementary school back then and couldn't grasp such theories and techniques back then.

He was annoying like that, trying to be a Mr Know-It-All when he really wasn't. Glad to know that at least that hasn't changed much about him.

But anyway, it was Reading Day and I was as prepared as I could be. Yuuto had just finished reading beside me. He didn't struggle on any words or anything, but his voice was still flat and lifeless, as if reading aloud was tedious to him. Mr. Himura thanked him and asked him to sit down again, Yuuto more than happy to oblige and sat back down again, his elbow resting on the table while his hand cradled his chin as he stared distantly out the window, still looking bored.

"Kurosaki," Mr. Himura had called to me. It was the only time I regret being deskmates with Yuuto. Because the two of us were often the quieter ones in class, the teacher seemed to think that we weren't participating, when it wasn't true at all. Both of us got good grades, so there wasn't much reason to be worried about us, and yet that seemed to be the case every Reading Day. I stood up nervously, feeling my legs shaking.

"Can you start us from the top of slide five, please?"

I remember nodding to him and turning to the right slide. It was something about the basics of Xyz summoning, something that's so old hat now. But I do remember stumbling over my words, my voice dropping in volume the longer I continued while the class snickered quietly. One even interrupted when I was really stumbling over a word, complaining that he couldn't hear. I remember feeling so embarrassed. I had practiced so hard before and it was all slipping away from me. Another girl in class, Yuiko's little sister, Junko, I think, volunteered to continue where I had left off, subtly noticing that I couldn't continue further. Mr. Himura agreed to let her do it, but he gave me a gentle look and asking to see him after class was over. The class laughed quietly as I sat down in my seat, my face feeling so hot and red that day. I remember thinking that if the ground could open up and swallow me whole, I wouldn't mind it.

But, back then, I didn't think that kind of wish could come true. And, thinking back on it now, I'm starting to think I shouldn't have.

Just as Junko was about to start her reading, the lights in the room flickered and turned completely off, the holoboard at the front turning off as well. The only light in the room was daylight from the sun outside and the dim glow of our holobooks. Mr. Himura tried to reassure us, I remember, that it was just a drill and that we should all try and stay calm. I remember looking at Yuuto and saw that he was also looking at me, his eyebrow raised in that way that it usually does when he doesn't know what's going on.

It was then that we heard screaming outside, both human screams and the sounds of a Duel Monster screaming in pain. I remember thinking that my D-Gazer hadn't notified us of a duel going on. Come to think of it, no one else's had either. Our first instinct was to set our D-Gazers to Duel Mode, to try and find the source of the duel going on.

But there wasn't one. Matter of fact, there weren't any duels going on at the time, since everyone was in their classes at that time. It wasn't free period yet, when there were usually duels galore. So the fact that it sounded like a duel was going on just outside yet it wasn't registering on the D-Gazers…

It still unsettles me to this day, feeling so tense with fear. Yuuto had even subconsciously moved closer to me, taking a hold of my arm. When I was about to ask him what he was doing, the door burst open, the room soon filling up with smoke. Yuuto pulled me down hard, under the desk as Mr. Himura demanded to know what was going on. He never did receive an answer. The last we heard from him after that, was him screaming in pain while the rest of the class stared in horror.

I don't remember his face, but I do remember thinking it was odd, a person in a school uniform was attacking us. It wasn't like our uniforms though, nor like the middle school uniform my brother had been sporting at the time. Matter of fact, the colors and his mask reminded me of a certain old Duel Monster, Obelisk the Tormentor, that had been long lost for centuries. It was used by the very first King of Games, Yuugi Mutou, along with his other legendary cards. It was like something from the history holobooks, something you don't expect to see in real life. Yet it was happening then. It's still happening now.

He set his monster down on his playmat, which was glowing like a hologram, in the shape of a sword even! No one had seen that model of Duel Disk before, let alone had known that holograms could hold up the weight of anything. Our wonderment soon turned to terror once his monster was summoned and it proceeded to run around the room, knocking into the walls and desks as if it were nothing, knocking chunks out of the wall and breathing fire. That kind of stuff was normal during a Duel, when holograms would simulate what would happen if Duel Monsters interacted with the real world, like knocking into buildings or whatever.

Yet, when that monster hit the wall, knocking a good chunk out of it, we could feel the crash of the falling stone. The heat in the room soared as it breathed fire and it felt like it was singeing my skin, like holding your hand over a hot burner, only much worse. The room had erupted into screams by then, and Yuuto and I were still hiding under the desk. I remember him whispering to me that we needed to move, to find a way out of here. I didn't know where to go then, just feeling so scared and terrified. My first instinct had been to stay hidden, to call for help on my D-Gazer, but our attacker would give us no luxury. He sent his monster around the room, now in chaos, knocking over desks and scattering students everywhere. And when a purple light came from his Duel Disk, kid after kid would scream and disappear, soon fluttering to the floor in the form of a card.

We didn't have much time, with the room slowly emptying and filling with rubble and cards. Yuuto did the only thing he knew to do. Keeping a firm grip on my arm, as soon as he saw that the attacker was distracted, he ran with me to the second door of the classroom, hiding us in the mass of escaping students. We escaped into the hall, finding the situation very much the same as back in the classroom. There were many more attackers out in the halls. The only thing we could do is run. I didn't know where we were going, but I just knew at the time we had to get away. I remember Yuuto had to break through a window when we were blocked on all other sides and us jumping down a few good feet to the ground below. Yuuto had broken most of my fall when we landed, but I had still landed wrong and my foot hurt really bad when I tried to run again. Yuuto, still bleeding from breaking the window and bruised from the fall as well, still took the time to take me onto his back and piggyback carried me to safety. I don't think I could have survived that day if Yuuto hadn't been there. Even now, I still think that. Yuuto has gotten me out of a lot scrapes, yet he never, ever, expects any thanks. I always do, don't get me wrong, and I've helped him out a lot too when he was in trouble. But, sometimes, I feel like he always saves me more than I do him.

He never hesitates if he thinks one of us is in danger, always the first to defend one of our friends and the last to leave to make sure the threat is vanquished. But he's also one of the less vocal of the group, preferring to stay on the outside and observe, only adding his input when necessary. He was like that in school too, preferring to be by himself and observe rather than actively participating. Maybe that's why I was always drawn to him. He's oftentimes quiet and observant; he lets you approach him first, even if you take your sweet time in doing so. It was relieving to me at the time, having not been very good at approaching and talking to people on my own. Yuuto made it feel like it was okay to approach him and talk to him, easy even. The other students in our class didn't seem to agree, I remember. Yuuto always seemed to have this dark air around him, like he was always cold and serious because he didn't really talk to anyone and he was always alone, not having many friends.

The first time I had approached him, well, it was because I felt bad that he wasn't eating at lunch one day. Sounds silly, right?

He was just sitting outside by himself under a shady tree, no kind of lunch to be seen. He wasn't even studying or anything under that tree. He was just sitting, alone like usual, with his eyes lightly closed and his breathing even. I had thought he was taking a nap at first, until one of his eyes opened when he heard me approaching. As usual, I was a fidgeting mess, trying to form the right words but failing miserably. Yuuto was patient though, despite his raised eyebrow at my approaching him. Finally, I showed him my reason for approaching him, which was to give him the cookies my mom had packed into my lunch. She always gave me too many, as if expecting me to share them with my friends. Expect, back then, I didn't have too many friends to share cookies with and my brother usually had his own share of desserts for lunch. Yuuto was surprised at the offering, the first time I'd seen such a bewildered expression on his face before. He also looked torn between accepting the offer and politely declining, but he ended up begrudgingly accepting the small offering when his stomach growled loud enough for *both* of us to hear. I think I might have laughed at him then, him blushing and pouting at being ratted out by his own stomach. I had my suspicions but Yuuto never would tell me why he didn't have lunch at school, or even money to at least buy himself a sandwich at the school cafeteria. Since then, I had made it my mission to make sure I had extra in my lunches, to make sure he at least had something to eat everyday. He never really said anything about it, but I could tell he was always grateful, tearing into the treats and snacks, almost choking on it he was eating so fast. And when I asked him if he'd like to come over to my house to study for an upcoming exam, he jumped at the chance, staying as long as he possibly could. My parents loved him, being so polite and soft-spoken with his 'Yes, Sir' and 'No thank you, Ma'am'. My brother didn't like him too much at first. When we were studying together one time, he actually came into my room and sat down at the table with our holo-books and notes spread out.

He didn't say a word, but just gave Yuuto this look of contempt, as if he was suspicious of Yuuto doing something gross and untoward behind closed doors. In spite of this, Yuuto chose to ignore him and only looked at me, continuing to ask study questions. When I got stuck on one question, however, my brother, in a low and flat voice, answered the question effortlessly. Then it was Yuuto's turn to give his own look of contempt. But my brother wasn't done yet. He decided to test Yuuto instead, reading the questions that were practically child's play to him, being a grade above both of us. Yuuto, not backing down from the challenge, answered the questions quickly, correctly, and effortlessly. He even answered questions correctly that weren't on our study slides, stuff that my brother was studying in his classes. They only stopped when Mom came into the room with cookies and drinks, thinking that we needed a break from studying with all the yelling of test questions and rapid-fire answering.

Yuuto became a frequent visitor at our house after that, even getting into the habit of walking me home no matter how long he stayed, and with or without my brother there to give him a hard time and disapproving looks. But, Shun also grew on him too. He liked to challenge Yuuto to duels all the time, whether he won or lost. I don't even remember what the record was back then, but I could tell that Yuuto was having fun too. He opened up a bit more everyday it felt like. He liked the frequent challenges my brother laid for him, and he would always lose track of time whenever he came over for a few hours, his smile growing brighter and more open as time went on.

Nowadays, he doesn't smile as much as he used to, but, once in a while, I do see the remnants of that once bright smile, the years of hard battling and harsh living conditions lifting off of him and he looks like the little kid I once knew that liked to walk me home and tear into my extra food when he thought I wasn't looking.

Maybe someday, when Heartland is free of those Fusion rats and we can start to rebuild again, I can see his smile one more time. The little boy smile that he used to have all those years ago.

I kinda just miss it, you know?


	2. You're Gonna Want This Back

It's been a few days since I last wrote here. I can't be writing all the time, after all. I'm a very busy girl after all!

But, I did go out on a search mission yesterday, and was it a good haul! I even managed to find some pants that were actually *too* long for my brother's legs! He'll be so happy that his ankles won't show anymore!

Yuiko even managed to find measuring tape, the kind that people used to use in stores to measure clothes, right? Her mother used to own a clothing boutique, so she knows how to measure people properly. Now everyone is getting measured for clothes, so that we know what to look for next time. Shun didn't look too happy about being measured, or it could be that Yuiko was the one doing it, especially when she kept commenting on his long 'stork' legs. He said she's one to talk, considering she just barely reaches his chin.

Yuiko fired back to him "At least she has some meat on her, unlike you who's nothing but skin and legs!"

Everyone laughed at that. Everyone except for Shun, who just glared at her. When it was my turn, she measured me in all the same places, save for one. She measured around my chest twice, taking note of the measurements there.

"You're still so tiny and cute, Ruri!" she said to me, pinching my cheek. "Here's to hoping that stork legs don't run in your family. You need to grow up into a hot buxom babe that has to chase all the boys off with a stick, after all!"

I know my face was really red based on how much everyone else was laughing or seconding Yuiko's comment with cheers of encouragement to keep all the boys off. My brother, however, was far from amused. His fist clenched and he bit down on his lip, but he didn't say anything. Instead he turned on his heel and walked outside, pulling out a map of Heartland.

Feeling bad about what Yuiko had said, I followed him outside, taking this notebook with me and sat down beside him. We didn't even have to say anything, just sitting down beside each other was enough. Probably more out of habit and not breaking his concentration, his arm came around my shoulders and pulled me in closer. He tended to do that often when we were alone, especially after that day, three years ago. It gave both of us a good scare, that day. Not knowing where he was, him not knowing where I was while both of the schools were in chaos and panicking.

I was with Yuuto at the time, running from Academia's soldiers that had invaded our school. Both of us had jumped out of a high window to get away and neither of us were spared injuries because of it. Yuuto's hand was still bleeding from breaking the window and I had twisted my ankle from the fall.

We couldn't sit still for long though. All around us, the buildings were being demolished by machine-like Duel Monsters, with the damage being very real. Fires breaking out everywhere, water pipes busting and shooting water into the sky, large chunks of stone and glass plunging to the ground and shattering into a million pieces.

We knew that we had to get out of there.

Despite his bloody hand, he still helped me onto his back, carrying me the best he could since I couldn't walk on my ankle, much less run. In the meantime, since I still had my D-Gazer, I tried to call anyone that could help us. I tried calling the police, my parents, even Shun. But, none of my calls were getting through. All I could get was static. Even setting it to Duel Mode to seek out an opponent, searching for Shun specifically, all I could get was loud, crackling static. I told Yuuto about it, that I couldn't get through on either network. He then said that the next best thing they could do was find her parents or the police if they couldn't be reached over the D-Gazer. My mom would have been at home, I remembered and my dad would have been at work. But, the more likely road would be to go to the police, the closest station being one transit stop away.

Having a direction to go, Yuuto got a better hold of me and began to run again, towards the middle school and across its lawn. It looked as though the soldiers had ransacked here too with parts of the building on fire and falling debris everywhere. I remember holding tighter onto Yuuto, hoping and praying that my brother was all right. Maybe he thought of the same thing, to go to the police for help and we could meet him.

But, fate had other plans for us. Of course it did.

We heard screaming again, causing Yuuto to immediately go against the wall, trying to conceal both of us. We saw middle school students running by, all of the classes mixing together in the chaos. There was no way that either of us could find Shun in all of that mess, and that purple light kept erupting in random directions, people dropping to the ground as cards. Both of us were frozen with fear. The purple light seemed to be coming from the direction of the school's entrance, the only way out of the area. Yuuto gently set me on my feet again, moving us to a nearby bush to hide. It couldn't hide both of us very well, but Yuuto stayed on the outside edge, shielding me the best he could. He was still bleeding heavily, glass shards were still deeply stuck inside his hand. I remember feeling so hopeless then. My closest friend was bleeding and bruised, I didn't know where my brother was, or if I would ever see him, my family, or anyone else again.

Even after everything that had happened before, this, I remember, is when I finally started breaking down and crying. Neither of us knew what to do, we were trapped in the open as two defenseless little kids.

It was then that a lone Academia soldier spotted us, a grin appearing on his face. "Looks like some little brats made it out of the first building after all," he said, slowly approaching us and lifting his Duel Disk into position. Both of us froze in fear, too stunned to even move.

"Well, we certainly can't have that, now can we?"

I braced myself behind Yuuto, closing my eyes tightly with tears streaming. I was so scared in that moment, even screaming would've be pointless.

Just as the light began to glow, the attacker gasped and choked in pain while falling to ground, along with a broken Duel Disk, unconscious.

Honestly, I was never more relieved to hear Yuuto call out 'Kurosaki-sempai' in my life, as there was only one person that Yuuto would call by that name. He seemed surprised to hear it too, recognizing Yuuto's voice. When Shun called out to him as he was removing the remains of his broken Duel Disk, Yuuto moved aside to let me stand again. When he realized that I was there, he called out my name too, much louder and full of desperation than for Yuuto and hurried over to us. I tried to meet him halfway, but my twisted ankle prevented me from moving very quickly. He didn't seem to care, only pulling me tightly into his arms once he was close enough, tighter than he had ever hugged me before. I was hugging him too, clinging so tightly I could feel my fingers going numb. I was crying too, telling him how scared I was and how I couldn't reach him or Mom and Dad through my D-Gazer and how everyone in my class was being turned into cards. He continued to hold onto me tightly for a few more moments, listening to me and trying to comfort the best he could. He was shaking too, I could feel it. He had to watch his friends and classmates being turned into cards left and right, helpless to stop any of it. Even when his teacher had challenged the attackers, his Duel Disk wouldn't register his opponent, or even did any real damage. They attacked in a group, so quickly that his teacher was rapidly overwhelmed, defeated, and turned into a card. Shun had been lucky to escape with his life, not knowing which of his classmates had escaped as well and which ones had been turned into cards.

Once we both had a chance to calm down, Yuuto told him of our previous plan, to go into the city and find the police. Shun had nodded, agreeing it was a good plan, but he didn't know how we were going to get past the goons at the gates, not to mention that me and Yuuto were still injured.

We came to a compromise for the time. We would find a place to hide, I remember, to wait out the onslaught until it was over since our main way of escaping was blocked. The only question was where we could hide. Hearing more distance screams moved all of us into action. Shun insisted on being the one to carry me this time. Yuuto was reluctant at first, but gave in, stepping aside to give us room. Shun did get me on his back, but I couldn't help but notice a large bruise starting to form on his arm, where his Duel Disk used to be. It gave him a little bit of trouble when he was supporting my legs, but he refused to acknowledge it, to either me or Yuuto. And Yuuto, noticing my brother's arm, though not saying anything, still gave him an incredulous look.

We travelled around for what felt like hours, everywhere we went, Academia soldiers were there, guarding various other gates to the schools, watching for anyone that was trying to escape. We were very lucky to get as far as we did, getting into the school's now abandoned cafeteria courtyard, piles of rubble, ash, and cards everywhere. It was a sad sight, a place that once teamed with so much life, whether it was with duels or with just other kids hanging around, to see it abandon and destroyed beyond compare…

Shun tightened his fist under my leg and clenched his teeth. It hurt him too, seeing the place that was filled with our memories, it was tough to look at. Yuuto looked especially pained, seeing the place where we first really talked to each other uprooted and ablaze.

Like the courtyard outside, when we went inside to the cafeteria proper, it was abandoned and in shambles, upturned tables, broken chairs, and more cards everywhere. Shun and Yuuto had to tread carefully, to make sure they didn't trip on anything. We finally settled into the kitchen area, locking and bracing the door against intruders. We then found the kitchen's first aid kit, so we immediately got to work on each other's injuries with many hisses and muffled groans ensuing. After a while, I tried to reach anyone I could on my D-Gazer again, both in Duel Mode and in Call Mode, to anyone at all, but to no avail. All that was there was the sharp crackling static again.

All three of us sat on the floor, looking lost. And, like now, Shun had his arm around my shoulders, holding me close while I sniffled quietly and wiped my eyes. I don't even remember how long we stayed in the kitchen, especially since there was only one small window and it was dark by the time the noises finally died down. It was darker than I ever remembered seeing it before.

We found out later that power had been cut out from the entire city, bringing it to a complete stand still. Transit trains couldn't run anymore, all calling and dueling networks were down, water and gas lines were all messed up beyond repair. The worst part about it was that it had happened so quickly. There were no signs, no warnings, no anything. Just, Heartland being plunged into chaos and terror. We couldn't even figure out why it was happening.

Where did Academia even come from? What did they even want with us? Or, worse yet, why did they want to destroy us?

Even now, three years later, those questions were still unanswered. The only thing we do know is that they wanted us all dead. No negotiation, not even a complete surrender. Just complete and utter annihilation. They want every single one of us dead, no questions asked.

Shun's hand just tightened on my shoulder. The others were calling us inside for dinner. I hadn't even realized it was that late already. Shun then removed his hand from my shoulder and put his map away and we both headed inside.

Academia may have greatly broken us, crippled us beyond repair, but we are never going to give up. We're going to get Heartland back. They can take all they want from us, but they can't break our spirit. Heartland will live on, forever! No Fusion scum bastard is going to take that away from us, ever!


	3. You're Gonna Wish These Days

Winter came early this year. I'm even shaking as I write this. I hope it's legible to read later.

What's happened so far? Still fighting Academia, Heartland is still a wasteland. Still kind of tired. And hungry, but that's normal. Cold is normal too. Probably should go find a pile of blankets to sleep under tonight if it's already this cold now, in the middle of the day.

Please tell me that I'm hallucinating and starting to see snow falling from the sky…

Nope, it's real snow all right. It felt cold and wet when it landed on my nose.

But, back to business. Still fighting against Academia. Check. Heartland is still a wasteland. Check. Still hungry and tired. And cold. Double check.

Oh yeah. We also…

How do I even explain this?

Well, we've finally found a way to fight back against Academia again, to be able to play on their level. We can summon monsters that we can actually touch now. It still feels so weird, being able to touch and interact with our monsters. Something we wouldn't have ever dreamed of doing before, having grown up with the AR system before, seeing the holograms through it and seeing them interacting with the world around them, but never the Duelist themselves.

Shun was the first to try it, summoning his Raidraptors-Vanishing Lanius as a test. And, when it was summoned, we could all feel the rush of the wind as it flapped its wings, even felt it's metallic body when I reached out to touch it, much to Shun's dismay. He had started to warn me that it might be dangerous, only to be proven wrong a few tense moments later when Vanishing Lanius started to preen both of our heads, much to the utter amusement of everyone else. It's beak in my hair felt real too.

Touching Vanishing Lanius and it touching me… it felt so amazing. There are times now that I wondered what it would be like to fly with it, but, unfortunately, we haven't gotten that chance yet.

You see… In order to get a working model of a Duel Disk that could stand up against Academia…

We had to steal it.

Well, not technically stole it.

In a sense.

It was more…

Sneaking into another Resistance's camp and borrowing it for a while.

Only not really returning it after we had modified it to figure out how it works enough so that we could copy it.

Totally didn't steal it. Nope. See?

My heart still beats so fast, thinking about that mission. It could have gone wrong in so many different ways, it wasn't even funny. I shivered involuntarily just now, so you know. A shiver that had nothing to do with the cold.

At first, we were just going on a scouting mission, to gather information and be done with it. We had never intended to steal anything that valuable from someone else that was fighting Academia, just like us..

But… the chance was there. And it was one of the newer members that took the chance. Yuuto and I didn't want to risk all of us being exposed, warned and told him off numerous times, but he took the chance anyway. He was heavily reprimanded for it later, but still…. That move, though it had given us a leg up in the fight against Academia…

It still felt wrong.

I've never been comfortable with stealing things from people, even now. Especially now. I've gotten used to it, given that its necessary to surviving in this hell… but still…

I don't think it ever will sit right with me.

Writing more today. Still cold and I have some free time today. Guess I should write some more about what happened after the first few days of the invasion.

Academia soldiers had finally retreated from our school, moving onto their next mission. Shun, Yuuto, and I finally escaped out of the school's kitchen. I only walked when it was absolutely, surely safe. Any sign of danger and I would go onto the back of one or the other, whichever one was closer. And all three of us certainly stayed closer than we ever had before. If times had been different, it would have felt like old times; Yuuto walking with me to my house, his old smile shining brightly; Shun tagging along, giving Yuuto dirty looks for walking too close to me with his bright smile; sometimes there would be a stop or two along the way where Shun and Yuuto would duel when one or the other was tired of the other not responding/getting on his nerves for too long.

Now, though the three of us are walking down the same, familiar road we've taken at least a million times before, it felt so different from before. None of us were really talking, just silently walking. No friendly conversations, no smiling or laughing, not even a snide comment from Shun about Yuuto walking too close to me.

Just… silence. Deafening, disquieted silence.

We walked along the familiar road, the smell of ash in the air and no lights were on inside of any of the buildings. The Obots had stopped working too, just sitting lifeless in the streets and on the sidewalks. I think all of us jumped when one tried to wake up again, it's robotic voice skipping and repeating its 'Trash!' and 'Cleaning!' chant until it died out completely with little sparks exploding from it. I remember clinging to Shun's shirt sleeve a little bit more after that.

That dying Obot was the last thing we would see for a while in our wanderings. Every building, every street we passed was all empty save for the occasional destroyed Obot or a card laying on the ground. Like the three of us walking, it was deathly silent in Heartland City. No cars passing by, no people, no music, no lights, no nothing save for piles of rubble and random fires scattered about.

It was the same when we arrived at the Transit station. No people, cards scattered about, rubble and ash was everywhere, and no sign of a moving train anywhere. So much for our plan of going to the police by transit. The only way we could travel now was on foot, a task that was getting harder the longer we looked at the desolate Heartland. Not to mention that all of us hadn't eaten yet since we left the school's kitchen. If it were a normal day, we would have been at my house by now, munching on cookies my mom made for all of us.

Now, wandering the silent streets of Heartland, we can't even find a single place that isn't destroyed that, before, would have went to if we were hungry. No burger places, no ice cream parlors, no bakerys, no pastry shops, not even a grocery store.

When we couldn't stand it anymore, we found the closest place we could find: a sandwich shop. Shun and Yuuto pushed the door in with their combined strength. When we went inside, even calling out to see if anyone was still inside, all we were left with was silence. No other customers, no Obots operating the cash registers or the food prep. Again, it was just the three of us, alone in the shop. We all looked at each other, trying to figure what to do. We were all hungry, but we didn't want to just bust back behind the counter and grab what we wanted. It wasn't right, and felt beyond rude.

But, soon, hunger got the better of us and we stepped carefully around the counter and the Obots, opening up the refrigerator and looked amongst the bread racks for something, anything, to eat. What we could find, we ate immediately.

We stayed in the back for a while, not really wanting to go back into the dining area, trying to figure out what our next move would be. It was going to be dark soon and who knew what kind of condition our homes were in. We certainly couldn't stay inside this sandwich shop forever. We needed to find our parents, the rest of our families, to make sure they were safe too. Yuuto was quiet about wanting to see if his family was okay, insisting more that we should check on my parents first. We lived closer to here than he did, he explained. Not to mention that all of us were tired of walking. We could rest easier in our house and recuperate there. I remembered feeling that I was worried, about Yuuto not being as adamant about finding his family than me and Shun were in finding ours. He reassured me though, that after we had rested at my house, we could go and find his family in the morning. That maybe he could call them from my house to see if they were okay. Phone calls from a residence had to still be working, right? I remember still feeling concerned, but let the matter be.

When we were on the road again, we were still silent as we walked down the abandoned streets,

quietly hoping for some sign of life, any sign. My feet were sore from so much walking we had done that day. I don't think I had ever walked that much up to that point in my life. I would get used to it later, of course, but… those first few weeks would be an eye opening experience.

When we finally reached the house, the neighborhood thoroughly trashed, we burst through the door, not even bothering to take our shoes off, something that we would have been scolded about the moment we walked in the door. We tried calling out for Mom, searching every single room, but she wasn't there. We even tried the backyard, but we still couldn't find her. We didn't lose hope, however, since we couldn't find any cards lying about on the floor, the only cards we could find were the extras Shun and I kept in our rooms that weren't apart of our main decks. We even went through those cards to be doubly sure, but we couldn't find one that had our mom's picture on it.

What we did find out at the house was that the electricity was out too, just like in town. There wasn't any running water either. No electricity meant no heat either. The phone wasn't working either, as we found out, so Yuuto couldn't call his parents either. He still insisted that we stay at our house for now, though. We shouldn't be wandering around at night anyway, in case those guys that had attacked our schools and the town were still around. Shun and I looked at each other, still suspicious, but let the matter drop again. We were all friends, after all. If Yuuto wanted to tell us something, he would do so.

So, instead we reconvened in Shun's room, finding some of Mom's scented candles and placed them around the room for light. Shun scrunched up his nose at the overwhelming smell in his room, but stayed quiet about it. He might not have liked Mom's scented candles before, but it did help us to see.

I decided to stay with the two of them in there, since I didn't want to be by myself in my room. Yuuto started to ask me something, but Shun jumped in instead, claiming that everyone should stay in his room. He then gave this suspicious look to Yuuto, just like he used to. Yuuto looked incredibly surprised at the outburst. The scene was just too funny, I couldn't help but laugh quietly, the other two soon joining. We needed that laugh, I think. It had been a long day, and that small sense of familiarity, something that used to be so ordinary before, it helped to ease our worries, if only a little bit.

However, even if I was going to sleep in my brother's room, I still insisted that I change into my PJs. Like I really wanted to sleep in my school uniform. Come to think of it, I probably had ruined my uniform by that point, with dust and debris, and the blood from Yuuto's hand when he had been carrying me before we met up with Shun.

I remember wanting so badly to take a shower then, to try and forget all the bad things that had happened recently, but finding out there was no running water in the house, let alone electricity to heat it, I was sorely disappointed when I went to the shower and remembered about the no running water. Instead, I had to make due with bottles of water from the fridge (which were still cold, by the way) and soap to wash what I could of the dust. I don't think I've ever been so disappointed by a bath since then.

I dug around in my closet afterwards, finding a warm pair to wear since there wasn't any heat in the house, and who knew when was going to be turned on again. I also tore the blankets off of my bed and grabbed my favorite pillow and dragged all of it to my brother's room, where it seems they had the same idea, having already pulled the blankets and pillows from my parent's bed for Yuuto. He was also now sporting a pair of my brother's pjs, said pjs just a bit too big on him. He didn't seem to mind, though. He even seemed minutely excited about having what was essentially a sleepover, the circumstances notwithstanding. For all the times he came over and stayed for hours, he'd never slept over before. It would be a first for all of us.

My nest of blankets was closest to Shun's bed, at his insistence. At first, he wanted me to sleep on his bed, but I outright refused that.

Cut me some slack! I was eleven at the time, and it was my brother's bed! There are just some things you just don't do.

Instead, I built blanket nests with Yuuto on the floor, his smile finally starting to return a little bit. I remember feeling glad that Yuuto was starting to feel better. He had me worried for a little while.

Shun went around his room blowing out the candles, stepping over the two of us into his own bed as we got comfortable in our nests. Saying goodnight to my brother, he only responded with 'good night, brats' and turned over in his bed. It wasn't exactly comfortable sleeping on the floor, but Yuuto didn't seem to mind. It was hard to tell what expression he had in the dark, but he seemed happy when he responded to my 'goodnight' to him.

My memory's fuzzy, but, I think, sometime during the night, I woke from a nightmare crying and someone was there to quiet me. I don't even remember if it was Shun or Yuuto. Maybe it was both. I do remember the feeling, feeling so safe and warm in someone's arms when all I wanted to do was cry, wanting to see Mom and Dad again. I think that I fell asleep like that, someone holding me and gently rubbing my hair, telling me that thing's will be okay again, that we can get through this, to not worry, and quietly shushing me.

The quiet didn't last for long, however. When the sun was barely even up in the sky, there was a loud noise from downstairs, startling all of us awake. Shun had somehow ended up on the floor with us, and Yuuto was a lot closer than I remembered him being last night. I was about to question both of them when that loud noise from downstairs happened again, silencing all of us. It didn't sound like Mom or Dad coming in. The voices were quite loud, boastful, as if they were quite proud about breaking into someone's house. All we needed to hear was 'Xyz scum' before we knew it was those soldiers again, and we knew we had to get out of there immediately. There wasn't even time to gather or change clothes, or even get supplies. They were quickly moving around the house, probably looking for survivors to card. As quietly as we could, we opened up Shun's bedroom window, climbed out onto the tree and climbed down to the street, trying to stay as quiet as we possibly could.

We heard more voices outside, effectively making us all feel like we were trapped. There was nowhere for us to go. We only got as far as the street, to Mom's car still sitting on the sidewalk. We were very lucky that Mom had a bad habit of leaving the doors unlocked, as well as a spare set of keys under her visor.

Now, I know what you're thinking. How on Earth can two 11 year olds and a 13 year old drive a car?

Not very well, I can tell you that much.

I don't think there was a thing we didn't hit before we finally figured it out. Mom was going to kill us for practically destroying her car. Though, to be fair, we were running for our lives and scared out of our minds trying to get away, so I think she'll be a tiny bit forgiving.

Maybe.

Hopefully.

After a while of crashing into things, we finally found some open road and drove as fast as we could away. I like to think the soldiers were too stunned to even think of carding us from the car, all three of us screaming at each other trying everything we could to make the car go where we wanted it to.

Well, what did you expect with three panicking kids in a big machine that none of them knew how to operate?

That car ride, though we didn't know where we were going, let us take in more and more of the destroyed Heartland that much more quickly. It was a harsh reminder that our home was being destroyed, and we were helpless to stop it. We were just three scared little kids, on our own. No parents, no teachers, no police, no other kids either. Just the three of us then.

It wouldn't be the first time it was just the three of us. Though I do love and care about our comrades, Shun, Yuuto, and I have been together for so long… I don't know think I'll be able to handle it if I were to lose either of them. We've been together for so long… How long would I survive if something happened to either of them? Could they move on without me?

It's scary to think about sometimes...


	4. Hadn't Gone By So Fast

Damn, it's so cold today…

I have watch duty with Yuuto today. I would be more excited about it, having not been on watch duty with him for a long time, but I'm having a harder time staying awake in the cold. Thankfully, the watch rotations are shorter in winter. We've already lost a lot of members to Academia in the last few months, we certainly can't have people dying of hypothermia and frostbite too.

Both of us are shivering under our thick blankets, even covered head to toe in as many layers as we've managed to find. If anyone were to see us, we'd only look like two piles of snow with goggles on them. I could even see wisps of warm air escaping from both of us as we breathed quietly, even through our thick masks and scarves. If both of us were younger or even slightly less mature, we'd probably pretend like we were smokers, or even like we were dragons that breathed fire and smoke rings into the air.

...No, it's probably best not to mention dragons around Yuuto. I don't want to…

I don't want to upset him. Not after… after what happened. It happened so long ago and yet…

Yuuto is, and always has been, my friend. He wouldn't hesitate to defend me, no matter where the threat was coming from. I'm more than willing to do the same for him. To me, he's no monster.

He's just… Yuuto.

Well, I'm probably going to be here awhile. Guess it's story time again. It'll keep me awake anyway.

I think I've mentioned it before, but, besides our group, there are other Resistance groups out there, some bigger, some smaller than us. They have their own rules, their own group dynamics. And we, that is, Yuuto, Shun, and I, were apart of a much bigger one than the one we have now. They called themselves the Resistance as well. They had managed to hole themselves out a safe haven in the old industrial district of Heartland.

It wasn't a bad little place at the time. We had been desperate then, having been on the run for weeks, all of us noticeably thinner than we had ever been. Ragged, starving, thirsty, weak, cold, sick; you name it, we were likely it. We had to abandon Mom's car a while back when we had finally pushed it to it's limit, burning all of the gas out of it and the exterior damage was too great. So, like when we had first left the schools, we were walking again, barefoot at that. In our rush to get away from the soldiers we had left behind all of our clothes, our shoes, everything.

In those few weeks, we did manage to find other clothes and shoes, but by the time we had, our feet were so scratched up, sore, and dirty, it almost felt like a waste to put on clean socks and shoes. At least we tried to clean up what we could of our messy feet, holding our hands over our mouths when we tried to use hand sanitizer to clean them, to keep us from screaming. And I thought having hand sanitizer on a papercut on your finger was painful, it was ten times worse on your feet that had countless little scratches and scrapes and mud caked onto them. I can only imagine what it felt like for Yuuto, his hand still having those bad scratches on them from before.

You'd think things would get better from there, right?

Sadly, no. It didn't get better, at all.

Food was becoming more and more scarce, and it was getting colder with the nights getting longer and darker as time went on.

Worse yet, I was starting to get a cough that just wouldn't go away, that cough only getting worse as time wore on.

We couldn't do anything about it. We didn't know where any place would have medicine at the time, and even then, we wouldn't know what would treat it. Everywhere we went, shops and stores were getting suspiciously emptier and emptier. The only thing we could do was keep a blanket around me at all times, trying our best to stay warm and dry. It started to get really bad one night as we were hiding in an old basement. It was dark, dank, but it was out of the rain. The boys had started a small fire, but it didn't get any higher because of the moist air. They were so worried, scared that they couldn't do anything for me. The only thing they could do was sit close, each having an arm around me to share their warmth, no matter how much I protested through the coughing. I didn't want them to get sick too, but they refused to let go. We might have fallen asleep like that, I think. Thankfully, neither Shun or Yuuto caught the cough from me.

No, it just had to escalate from there. Of course it did.

I remember waking up feeling weak and aching everywhere in the morning. I felt hot in some places and cold in others. I could barely move, and even when I did, I felt sluggish and slow. Shun and Yuuto had woken up before me, discussing and trying to figure out what to do. They refused to leave me behind, but I was getting sicker, that much was obvious. They were lost in what to do.

I remember weakly calling out to them then, my voice hoarse from coughing and sickness, but they were quick in coming to my side. They both noted how flushed my face was, Shun's hand coming up to feel my forehead and neck. His hand felt so cold against me, I almost didn't want him to remove it, but it confirmed all of our suspicions: I had a fever, and a high one at that. What's worse, we started to hear voices outside. We couldn't even take the time to rest here until the fever went down. Shun wrapped me into the blanket again, and pulled me onto his back while Yuuto gathered up our meager amount of supplies we had managed to find in our weeks of traveling. He was never far behind Shun, keeping an eye out for trouble. I remember reaching out my hand to him a few times, even tried to smile for him. He squeezed my hand when he was close enough, but he still looked so worried.

The coughing and chills only got worse the further we traveled. I felt so weak, even when we stopped to rest, I could barely stand up anymore. Yuuto even had to catch me when we stopped and Shun was letting me down. They were very on edge, being chased by some far off voices and there wasn't any real shelter nearby to protect us and I was getting worse, fast. We had no way of defending ourselves, I remembered. No Duel Disks, not even any sort of weapon. We were sitting ducks, helpless in the open.

Shun gritted his teeth and clenched his fist while he searched around for anything, anything at all, that could be used as a weapon. He didn't want to run anymore. While looking around, he told Yuuto to take me and run, to go somewhere safe, that he'll hold them off as long as he can. Yuuto and I protested, of course. We didn't want to leave Shun behind, but Shun yelled at him to do as he's told. 'Keep Ruri safe as if your life depends on it, Yuuto!'

Yuuto barely had me on his back when the voices called out again, closer than ever. Both of them got on the defensive. I was getting dizzy, losing my sense of balance. The tall surrounding buildings felt like they were spinning out of control. I lost my grip on Yuuto then, and landed on the ground, coughing so long and hard and barely a breath in between, I felt I could've coughed up an organ or two. Both of them called out my name, coming to my aid, but everything felt so hazy, it was hard to remember all of it.

Someone had called out again, asking for Shun and Yuuto to stand down, that they weren't the enemy. Shun stood up again, yelling something, I don't remember what it was, but his voice soon stopped cold, as if he recognized the voice. Yuuto wasn't speaking either, as if he was stunned into silence too. Everything was so hazy around me, I was breathing hard and shallow, barely even able to at some points, barely aware of what was going on. Next thing I knew, my blanket was being taken away to be replaced by a very warm, large coat and being taken up into a strong pair of arms. A soft voice was talking to me, but I couldn't understand what it was saying. It sounded vaguely familiar, as if I heard that voice a hundred times before, but for the life of me, I couldn't figure out where I'd heard it before. It was an adult male voice, but it wasn't my Dad's voice, nor the voice of any of my teachers. I tried to open my eyes, to try and focus again and I did get a glimpse of something shiny, looking like gold in the dim sunlight, and a blob of dark blue or maybe black, with something pink or red, I can't remember. But, though every instinct within me was telling me to be scared or to fight back, I was feeling so warm, and not just by the coat or the arms that were carrying me. My bracelet felt warm too, like maybe it was reacting to something. What it was, I don't think I'll ever know. It had never reacted to anything before then, just acted like an ordinary bracelet.

By then I was too tired to try and focus anymore and lost consciousness after that, the last sensation I remember feeling was something touching my forehead, brushing my hair aside, almost comforting in a way. Mom used to do that too, brush aside my hair whenever I was sick in bed.

Off watch duty now and sitting by the fire now, trying to get warm. Even taking the precautions to cover my hair, it still manages to snow and icicles in it. Yuuto's trying really hard not to smile as I try to get the icicles out of my hair. He's got icicles in his hair too, so he shouldn't laughing at me. Jerk.

Anyway…

When I finally came back around, I was on a cot covered with a thick blanket. The room wasn't especially bright, but there was a fire going nearby, making everything very, very warm. A lady had been nearby, lightly humming to herself as she was dipping her hands into a bowl of water. My coughing alerted her to me finally being awake. She wringed out a wet cloth from her water bowl and came closer to me, putting the cool, wet cloth on my forehead. She asked how I was feeling, what my name was, how old I was, things like that. I tried my best to answer her, my throat was so dry and sore though. The best she could do was give me a cup of water and the promise of a cough drop after I ate something. And I wasn't about to say no to food, especially after weeks of barely having any. The lady was nice enough to help me to sit up and help me with eating, her talking to me throughout most of it. The only time she turned away from me was when she went to get some warm soup, a camp specialty, she told me.

She told me about the camp as she was getting the soup, about how her and her husband banded together with what was left of their friends and relatives and hid out here. It frustrated her husband so much, she said. He wanted so badly to fight against this enemy, Academia, but he had no way to fight against them. It didn't help that he had his family to think about, too. His growing family at that, she stated and as I had quickly noticed as soon as she said it. I was so flustered that I could barely get out a congratulations. She smiled and thanked me, soon continuing her story. Her husband wanted to fight the enemy, but he didn't want to leave them behind defenseless either. The only things he could do now was keep everyone together and survive the best they could. It reminded me of Shun and Yuuto, about how much they wanted to fight this enemy, but they still cared enough to not leave me behind, even if they could have so easily.

That reminded me to ask the lady about them, if they were around somewhere. Once I started to describe what they looked like, the lady's eyes lit up with recognition. Yes, she knew those two boys, the ones that were here every day since they came here, to check up on how I was doing. It was almost like clockwork whenever they came. If they weren't there together, it was usually one or the other coming to ask about me. There was even one night she had to leave for a moment and when she had came back, both boys had snuck in and had fallen asleep on the cot with me. She scolded them about it later, but she hadn't had the heart to wake them at the time, letting it pass that one time. Even put a blanket over all of us to make sure they didn't catch cold.

The lady laughed at my reaction to imagining the scene. Even now, it's bringing a bit of pink to my face just thinking about it… just… my brother… and Yuuto…..

No, it's probably best not to think about it. Stay on track, Ruri!

I was really, really lucky to have a quick recovery, much to the relief of everyone, especially Shun and Yuuto's. Who knows what would have happened if I hadn't been found when I had been, by the lady's husband and their friend Haruto Tenjo, nonetheless!

By the way, the lady's husband?

It was former Duel Champion Yuuma Tsukumo.

No wonder Shun and Yuuto had been stunned into silence before. Their childhood hero, a Duel Monsters Champion at that, had been chasing after them to try and bring them into safety. I can only imagine their faces once he approached them and wrapped his jacket around me and carried me back to their camp.

What, I'm not blushing. My face is still flushed from the cold, that's all.

He's a married man and he has a kid, stop what you're thinking. Besides, I'm fourteen, heck, eleven at the time when I met him.

That's gross. Not interested in the least. Nope.

ANYWAY!

We fell into a routine at that camp, even finding some familiar faces from both of our schools there. It made all of us happy and relieved, to find those familiar faces, some that were our age that had survived the initial onslaught. They were with us just like old times, learning how to be lookouts and scouts, scavengers and quick thinkers. Yuuto and Shun certainly loved challenging Yuuma to duels in their spare time, the former champion more than happy to indulge. The old Duel Disks didn't work as well as they used to, nor did the D-Gazers, but they still worked well enough for our purposes. It still wasn't a weapon we could use against Academia, but it was a good way to blow off some tension. Shun and Yuuto always lost to Yuuma, of course, but they never did give up. He always had a big grin on his face whenever they challenged him. Matter of fact, when he wasn't spending time with his new family, he was being a teacher, helping us to improve our dueling skills, even if we couldn't fight against Academia just yet. I think he enjoyed it too, being a teacher to all of us kids. He was always encouraging us, to do our best, to give him all we got.

In a way, he was slowly building up my confidence more than any of my past teachers had. He had no previous training as a teacher before, as far as we all knew, but through his own stumbles and sometimes confusing messages, he still taught us to believe in ourselves. He even organized a training day for all us kids, where all of us could challenge him head on. Shun and Yuuto jumped at the chance, even challenging him twice, both individually and as a tag team. Yuuma still defeated them, both times of course, but they were so excited, they didn't even care that they had lost. Yuuma kept on going on down the line, everyone excited to challenge him. I was nervous, naturally, when he was coming closer and closer towards me. I hadn't even thought of my nervousness in classes for months. How could I with what had happened to all of us?

Still, that nervousness came back times a million. Everyone was cheering for me, to do my best, and even one to 'kick his ass into Sunday' from Yuiko.

I still have no idea where her then 13 year old self had learned that from.

Yuuma was encouraging all the way through the duel, complimenting me about my monsters and traps, even didn't mind when I messed up a Xyz summoning. He was patient throughout the duel, even smiling when I managed to knock down his Life Points down a few pegs, much to the excitement of the other kids, most of which were still yelling out encouragements to keep going.

Too bad Dueling couldn't have stayed like that, where your opponent was encouraging you, telling you relax and just do your best, your friends cheering for you, everyone was having fun and, best of all, no one was getting hurt or carded when they lost.

Unfortunately, we had to learn that hard way, that we couldn't always use Dueling as a tool for fun anymore. I wish that-

Whoops, being called again for watch duty. Didn't I just get off of watch duty? I think there's still icicles in my hair from the first round. Ugh.


	5. These Are Some Good Times

**Warning!** Let's just say I personally like to nickname this chapter 'Girl Puberty.' As Ruri is a person with a vag, it's a thing that happens to peeps with vag's. As a person with a vag, this has happened on occasion and since Ruri falls in the age range that this usually first occurs in, I'm sure this had to have happened at least once.

That and it's fun to scar Shun and Yuuto for life.

So, trigger warning for blood and talking about that thing that happens to peeps with vag's once a month, give or take.

* * *

When was the last time I saw the sun? I mean, really saw the sun? It feels so long ago now. It feels like it's only out for a minute in winter sometimes, making the nights much longer and more dangerous. If Yuuto and Shun have watch duty, I'll have to be with the other girls for sleeping. The other girls, like Yuiko, are nice enough, but they tend to talk more than I like to talk, usually with the gossip of the day. Who did this, who did that, who they thought was cute, how they can't wait for summer just to see those cute boys going shirtless. And, this never fails to happen, there's usually at least one or two that ask if I could help them to talk to my brother, since, to them, 'he's so dark and mysterious and cool, it's hard to approach him'.

I used to laugh at that, because, really, my big brother? Dark? Mysterious? Hard to approach? Surely they weren't talking about the same person, my brother Shun Kurosaki?

Now, it's more annoying than it is funny. Yuiko usually teases me because I make a certain face whenever someone approaches me with a certain tone of voice with a question about my brother. It's a mix between being annoyed and 'no, not this shit again', she tells me. She thinks it's especially funny when I turn down them 'anonymously' giving me presents to give to him, or that I will often just say 'Just go over and talk to him, it's the easiest way to get him to notice you.'

I mean, he's not that complicated. Talk to him and he'll usually talk back. It's not that hard.

Then they usually don't like me because I wouldn't help them 'get in' with my brother, whatever that means. Then I'm usually accused of 'not being romantic' or being 'a spoilsport.' Not that I really care, but I'm not my brother's keeper! If he wanted a girlfriend, I'm sure that he could do it on his own without my help. I don't want to be involved in that kind of nonsense!

Then again, those that want to talk to my brother, usually tease me about Yuuto and how much I like him, which, sadly, always leads to my face turning red. They think that they can use that as blackmail against me, even if it doesn't really work. Yuuto is my friend more that anything. So what if I think he's cute, and that he looks good with his shirt off when he has to take it off in summer to keep cool. He seems to blush a lot too whenever he sees me in summer, when we all are only walking around in shorts and tank tops.

Well, he seems to blush a lot whenever any of the girls wear tank tops in summer and he usually looks away soon enough, sometimes holding his nose for some reason.

Well, okay I'm sure that we all kind of do smell, especially when it's summer and we're all sweaty and gross, even the girls, but c'mon Yuuto. We can't be as bad as the boys could be, and they could really, really stink on some days, sometimes for weeks.

Don't believe me? I've live with two boys, one of which I've lived with the majority of my life. Trust me, I know how they can stink. You learn to live with it after a while, as it just becomes part of daily life.

* * *

As luck would have it, I did have to stay with the girls for sleeping tonight. Both Shun and Yuuto had watch duty that night, so I had to stay with the girls to stay warm.

Though I might talk about how much I don't like them, there are times that I'm glad they're here. I'm still closest to Shun and Yuuto, but...

Well, to put it simply, they're not girls.

It's a little embarrassing to talk about this, but... well, it is a part of the story so... I kinda have to.

It happened back when we were still with our first resistance group. You know, where we were with Yuuma Tsukumo and his family and friends? We had survived into the spring with them. Shun, Yuuto, and I had our own space, sleeping on pallets and keep our small treasures there. Small treasures usually consisting of combs, mirrors, cool stones, music boxes, little toys, things like that. We tended to sleep closer together during the colder nights, further apart on warmer nights, but it was our little space and people tended to leave us alone.

I remembered it being a particularly cold night for spring, so Shun was sleeping closer to keep both of us warm. Yuuto would have been with us, but he was training to be a night-watcher at the time. We all went through that training when we were younger, to be used to long nights when we would be watching for Academia. Instead, it was just Shun, having an arm around me as we slept, keeping the other warm through the night. He had been growing taller over the past few weeks, so he practically engulfed me whenever his arms were around me, getting taller and bigger almost every day, it felt like.

It was that morning that we had discovered that something was wrong.

I remember waking up feeling something cold and wet on me. I thought it was gross because I had thought one of us had wet the pallet, seemingly.

I will tell you, on good authority, that neither of us are bed-wetters nor have we ever been, even when we were kids.

...Anyways.

I was starting to wake up and felt the dampness on me. I was about to sleepily tell Shun off for not going to the bathroom before bed and pissing on me in his sleep, when I realized that that something cold and wet was also sticky. I could also feel it deeply between my thighs, becoming slick as I moved.

Shun was still asleep when I pushed his arm off me, trying to investigate what it was that was on me. What was on me, however, made me scream, effectively waking up Shun. If I hadn't been freaking out, I'm sure I would have laughed at his face at being startled awake. His hand was on his Duel Disk before either of us could blink, but I just couldn't stop screaming. When he asked me what was wrong, I couldn't even gather the words, I was so freaked out. When he finally looked down, he saw why I was screaming, turned pale and looked horrified.

There was blood everywhere. On my clothes, on the blankets, on the pallet, and even some on Shun too. He was looking around the area, thankful for the two of us being alone when I had screamed, but that also meant that an enemy could have just sneaked in and seriously hurt me and ran afterward. He had grabbed at my shoulders, trying to see if I remembered if someone had come in and attacked me, asking me where it hurt the most, but I was just as clueless as he was. Funny thing was, though there was blood everywhere, I don't remember feeling any really sharp pains anywhere. Maybe some stomach cramping, maybe a bit warmer than usual, but nothing that major. Shun was still quick to take me into his arms and rush towards the medic area, calling out to anyone that was there.

To make a long story short, we both had... learned some things that day. Some things... that were quite... enlightening.

Poor Yuuto, though.

He had come back to an empty pallet covered with blood and blankets strewn everywhere and had assumed the worst had happened. When he went looking for us, asking around what happened, if we had been attacked recently, but no one seemed to know where we were nor had we been attacked else there would be more of an uproar, worrying him more.

Yuiko had found him like that, asking around if anyone had seen me or Shun. When she asked him why he looked so worried, he told her what he had come home to. She concluded that, if there was blood involved, then we must be in the medic area and Yuuto took off like a shot, surprising Yuiko.

Yuuto may be small, but he was certainly fast, especially so when he was determined and worried. Yuiko could barely keep up with him.

By the time they had arrived, Kotori, Yuuma's wife, had explained things to me and Shun, both of us looking quite pale and stunned. She had given Shun a spare set of clothes while she took me aside to help clean the blood off of me in the showers. It's how Yuuto found Shun in his stunned stupor, now taking his turn in shaking someone's shoulders, demanding to know what had happened and where I was. From his own words, Yuuto found that Shun was muttering to himself, something about blood and girls, making him worry all the more. Luckily, Yuiko had put two and two together and figured it out. She took Yuuto aside while Shun was still trying to process what he had just learned about girls. Yuuto wasn't happy not knowing what was going on, nor the fact that Yuiko was leading him out of medic area.

Yuiko had to be the one to explain to him about what was happening as she lead him back to our sleeping area, explaining that nothing was wrong, just that I was growing up and becoming a woman. When Yuuto still didn't understand, Yuiko decided to tell him, in detail, what it meant when a girl started bleeding when she wasn't visibly injured anywhere. Soon, he had the same look on his face that Shun had, stunned into silence and looking a tad pale. Yuiko even had to walk him through washing the pallet and our blankets, he was so out of it because of the new information thrust upon him.

We have never spoken of the incident again, and Shun and Yuuto usually shut up and look away whenever any of the other girls bring it up, finding some sick joy in our collective embarrassment.

It wasn't too bad afterward, even if the girls still sometimes snicker at the two of them, but I did find a care package from the other girls when we got back consisting of hot water pads, old torn pieces of cloth, some of the things that Kotori had given me to catch the blood and some small packages of chocolate, something that was really, really rare to come by these days, especially still good chocolate. I felt so touched by their kindness, I remember.

There are so few other girls in our group now, it sometimes makes me kind of sad. I mean, I'm always sad whenever we lose our friends and comrades, don't get me wrong, but...

I don't know. I guess, outside of Shun and Yuuto, they were so close to me. They were my friends too and we supported each other whenever times were tough.

I miss them sometimes, you know?

* * *

We were scouting for supplies today. It was still very, very cold out today, but the weather was clear, so we figured it was safe enough to try and replenish our supplies.

Shun and Yuuto were scouting ahead in case there was trouble, while Yuiko and I searched for supplies. We had all gotten used to the quiet of Heartland by now, even welcomed it as it helped us to hear if danger was coming. Still, there was an eeriness to the silence that I don't any of us could ever get used to, the only sounds we could hear was the wind and some of the surrounding buildings settling. We can sometimes hear the echoes of what Heartland used to be, a city surrounded by lights and music, something that none of us could have imagined being gone one day.

Yuiko had a habit of picking up what she could find of the cards littered about the city, the many that fallen under the might of Academia. She does it in hopes of paying respects to them, giving them proper send offs instead of blowing away in the wind to be torn or ruined by the elements, even though it's been about three years since then, so some of the cards are probably beyond repair by now.

She stops when she finds one card in particular, causing her to freeze. Though every other time I've seen her, Yuiko was always bright and hopefully, optimistic, sometimes a little foul-mouthed, but she still had a good heart.

But, looking at that one card in particular, her determined look seemed to shatter and fall into despair. When I asked what was wrong, she could only say that she finally did it; she had finally found her.

I leaned in closer to see who it was that she had found, finding the portrait of an older woman, looking a lot like Yuiko and Junko, her little sister. And, like the rest of the cards we have found, she looked to be in pain, but she was still determined. Her clothes also looked similar to the rags we wore, implying she had survived for at least while before...

Before I could think anything more, Yuiko collapsed onto her knees, holding tightly onto that card, tears starting to stream down her red cheeks.

'I-it's my Momma, Ruri.' She explained to me, 'the stubborn old broad. I never even got the chance to say goodbye.' She told me about her mother, the one that wanted her to be a proper lady all the time, to dress nice and be pretty when Yuiko just wanted to be herself, crude and funny as she was. It led to a lot of fights between her and her mom, who always seemed to compare her to her prettier and seemingly perfecter younger sister. Matter of fact, she had a big fight with her the day the invasion happened. She didn't even remember what it had been about, it happened so long ago. Now, finding her mother's card like this, out in the open in the dead of winter three years later...

I did the only thing I could do and pulled her into my arms as she cried into me, sobbing hard.

"You're so lucky to still have your brother, Ruri." She told me, reminding me of when we lost Junko last winter. Yuiko had taken it pretty hard then, her only family taken from her so cruelly by Academia. We were lucky to stop her from taking on Academia by herself then, else she would have been carded then too, her grief so powerful then.

"Hold onto him. Don't be like me and push your family away. Keep them as close as you can. If you fight with him, resolve it as soon as you can. Don't be like me, Ruri, and live with regrets."

She then asked if she could be alone for a little while. I didn't really want to leave her alone, especially with the harsh winter wind starting to pick up, but she insisted. That I could have Yuuto helping me to find stuff for the camp while Shun stood guard. He was good at that.

I soon respected her wishes and wandered ahead to find Yuuto, just as Yuiko had asked. The image of her kneeling on the ground, looking broken and shivering as the snow starting to fall was the last image I had of her before running ahead to find the boys.


	6. So Take A Good Look Around

I had a strange dream last night. It's not unusual for me to dream, but it's usually nightmares that get to me, or it's just a large open space where I'm alone, surrounded by just this blank void, that'll usually turn into a nightmare. This new dream almost felt like a welcome change, being used to that dreamless void, or the nightmares that followed.

Instead of an endless void, I was standing in a field of wildflowers. I hadn't seen one in such a long time, outside of a field spell, that I almost knew immediately that this was a dream.

Everything was quiet and calm, the wind gentle and smelled of the flowers, unlike the foreboding wind I was used to back in Heartland, carrying with it the scent of ash and decay. Everything was so quiet, yet I wasn't feeling nervous at all. Maybe it was the effect of the dream, making me feel hazy and drowsy.

Suddenly, I felt something bump into my arm, nearly knocking me off balance. I reached forward and grabbed onto the shirt of whoever it was that was running past me.

It was a little boy, looking desperately around, afraid and frantic. I was shocked myself, seeing the familiar blue-green hair and golden eyes of my older brother. This boy looked so much younger than him and yet the resemblance was uncanny.

He was also stubborn like my brother, trying desperately to get me to let him go.

"I have to find my sister!" he pleaded, struggling to get free, "she's lost somewhere, probably scared and crying! I have to find her!"

I wanted to help him, whether or not he had a resemblance to my own brother, but my voice just wouldn't work. My feet wouldn't move. Everything was frozen in place. I couldn't figure out why my body wasn't responding to my commands. Or to his.

"Let me go!" he yelled at me, desperately trying to free himself. I wanted to let him go, but I couldn't for some reason. My grip on him just wouldn't loosen.

"Let me go!" he tried again, "I have to find Ruri! Let go of me!"

That time, it felt like something inside of me snapped and I finally released him, falling backwards as the boy took off away from me. Then, I was free falling into the empty black void, only to wake up moments before hitting the ground, causing me to wake up with a start.

I was alone in the pile of blankets, and, in a way, I was glad. How can I explain that kind of dream to Shun or Yuuto? Nightmares they could understand, and sometimes the endless black void, but I had never had a dream like that before. It felt more frightening and real than any of my previous nightmares. My bracelet felt warm too.

What on Earth was all of that? I could still feel myself shaking from the memory of that dream. Was it trying to tell me something? Trying to warn me?

I don't know... Wish I did, because that felt a little too weird to not be significant...

* * *

Hey, it looks like the sun's coming out today, after a few weeks of no sun! Finally...

It's still unbearably cold outside, but it wasn't all that bad with the sun coming out!

Shun's not impressed.

Matter of fact, he just grumbled and rolled over, using the extra blanket to cover his head from the light.

...That's right, he had watch duty last night, so it's probably better to just let him sleep for now.

Yuuto was up though, watching Shun roll over with a bemused expression on his face. Both of us knew that, even though all of us are light sleepers by habit, there are times when all of us just crash and will not wake up for nothing once we found a safe space. Shun was especially guilty of this.

So, instead, Yuuto asked quietly if I wanted to go get something to eat while Shun sleeps. I nodded, quietly making sure that Shun was warm enough by himself, adding a cheeky 'Good night, Big Brother' whisper to his covered head. His response was the best and most loving one, of course.

"Shut up and go back to sleep, Ruri."

I snickered quietly to myself and stood up with Yuuto's help, him acting like a gentleman helping a lady step over a mud puddle. Except this mud puddle was breathing, and would probably murder both of us for disturbing it without good reason.

Well, he usually threatens it, but he hasn't done it. Yet.

I mean, we're both still here, obviously. I wouldn't be writing this if I wasn't here, right?

* * *

Yuuto and I walked a little closer together to stave off the bitter cold. Both our noses and cheeks were red by the time found something edible, sitting in the sun in a vain attempt to warm up.

It did help, even if it was little bit. If not for our bodies, I'm sure it did lighten up our spirits. Like it was a reward for making it through another winter.

Has it really been three years now, since Academia had invaded?

How many of us are even left?

Outside of our group, and besides the Academia scum that are sure to come back again now that winter is over, how many people are left in Heartland?

It's hard to say. I wish I could, but I don't know. Are they in hiding, waiting for the right moment to strike back at Academia?

It's a hopeful thought.

Yet, it's rare to see groups anymore. And, though it's sick to think about sometimes, I think I prefer finding cards on the ground, like what Yuiko used to do, instead of the steadily increasing findings of-

No, I shouldn't think about that. I'd rather not lose my breakfast and worry Yuuto.

Yuuto...

Outside of Shun, he's the one who's stayed with me the longest.

I sometimes wonder if he's really okay. I mean, neither of us have found any traces of our parents, but... I still have Shun to look after me. Yuuto, as far as I know, doesn't have anyone. As long as I've known him, I don't think I have met his family. Before Academia had invaded, he was usually the one coming over and staying with us, not the other way around. Come to think of it, I don't even remember his original address, it's been so long.

I've thought about asking him about it numerous times, especially when we're alone like this, but I just never can bring myself to do it. It's his personal business, and if he wants to talk about it, I'm more than happy to listen to him. Plus, it's in the past now. Who we were back then is so different from who we are now.

We're not the little kids we used to be. No more walking home together anymore, no more sharing cookies and snacks with him after school, no more of Shun sitting in on our study sessions giving Yuuto the stink eye while Yuuto blatantly ignored him and carried on with the study session. Laughing with each other when one of us (or Shun) says or does something unintentionally (and sometimes intentionally) funny.

Now it's just... surviving together. Caring for each other when we get sick or injured. Watching each others' backs for signs of danger. Staying close to keep each other warm when it's cold. Leaning on each others' strengths when working together, whether it's to do chores and tasks, searching for supplies, or even in skirmishes against Academia. All of this, I doubt I could have done on my own. Yuuto had been my first protector in the invasion, before we had met up with Shun. And he chose to stay with us throughout all of this, never wavering in his loyalty.

What goes on in his mind, I wonder, that makes him want to stay with us for so long? I'm sure that living with me and Shun can't be easy, but Yuuto still does it, gladly sometimes. He's practically like family now.

Sort of.

I mean, I'm sure Shun thinks of him as a brother and best friend, but me...

I'm sort of confused.

I've known Yuuto for a long time now, probably as the best friend I've ever had. But, when I think of him, I don't see him as a brother, definitely not the same way I think about Shun. And best friend doesn't seem strong enough to accurately describe it. Yuuto has gone above and beyond the realm of 'friend', I think. Some of the other Resistance member I consider my friends, and there's nothing wrong with that, but Yuuto... he's on a different plane than the others.

The others have teased us about being boyfriend and girlfriend, (both of us turning red, of course) but that doesn't feel right either.

I mean... it's hard to describe.

The other girls thought of him as a cute little brother, the perfect match for Ruri, 'the little sister'. They sometimes ruffled his hair, teased him whenever he blushes, but... I don't think of him like that either. It was especially annoying when the others would made kissing noises at us if they saw us unexpectedly close together.

Yuuto would turn red at these moments. I would be lying if I said I wasn't blushing right alongside him.

Usually by then Shun would happen by and give them a death glare for implying that our relationship was more than it actually was. Or Yuiko would happen by and, though she would sometimes tease us too, if the others were going too far, she would stick out her tongue and make gagging noises. Either that or she'd exclaim 'they're fourteen! Get a life, you perverted freaks!'

I miss Yuiko. If only there was more that we could have-

Yuuto nudges my arm, pointing to something in the melting snow. I looked as hard as I could, trying to see what he was pointing out to me, noting a small splash of color.

A small flower was starting to bloom despite the cold and surrounding snow. The first flower of spring. I smiled in spite of myself.

When was the last time I had seen flowers in Heartland, really? Like, a genuine, real flower, and not a hologram?

I turned to Yuuto, to show him my excitement. Yes, I was getting excited over a tiny flower, but... after three years of not seeing them? When the norm in Heartland these days was gray, rubble and dust? Even just this small touch of color, a reminder of what Heartland used to be, brightened up my spirits considerably.

Yuuto was smiling too, happy that I had noticed the little flower. It's nowhere near how he used to smile, but I could still feel it's warmth.

Whatever Yuuto is supposed to be to me, I hope we can stay whatever it is. Don't ever change, Yuuto. Ever. You're fine just the way you are. You don't need to change.

* * *

Yuuto...

Yuuto...?

Yuuto... oh gods, Yuuto...

Yuuto!

How can- How can anyone...

No, Yuuto! You- How can-!

I'm still shaking... Yuuto...

Oh gods, Yuuto...

No! Yuuto! Yuuto!

Don't- Yuuto!

We... we found her. We found Yuuto's mom and she was... oh god...

I can't get that smell out of my nose... and those soldiers... those... those BASTARDS! She... she was already-!

Yuuto's screaming at them! No, Yuuto, don't-!

* * *

Okay, Yuuto's asleep now. Thank goodness. He was taking all of this pretty hard and... his eyes are still red from crying. I think he might have a fever too. I hope he's not getting sick, after all this.

Yuuto...

Oh... there's a lot of false starts in here...

Well, a lot has happened... A lot more than I think any of us were expecting to happen. You'd think we'd learn to expect certain things by now but...

Even after three years, there are still some things that can take us off guard, even the most hardened of us.

Like I mentioned before, we... we had found Yuuto's mom.

Unfortunately, not in a good way did we find her... I'm still shaking just remembering it.

To be more accurate, we found her corpse.

Not her card, like we how we found Yuiko's mom, but... an actual body.

From what we could tell, she had froze to death, something that all of us fear whenever the weather turns cold. All of us had been lucky these past three years, but... sometimes, others aren't as lucky as we are.

Yuuto had been devastated. The look on his face when we found her, when he recognized her face. He was utterly crushed.

Unfortunately, the winter weather was picking up, so we couldn't stay for long. We had promised Yuuto that we would come back in the morning, when it was safer, and give her a proper burial. It had to take a lot of pulling and begging, but we finally convinced Yuuto come back with us, so that he wouldn't fall to the same fate.

Now, I'm wishing we had done the burial then and there, no matter what the weather had been doing.

As we'd promised, we headed back to where we had found her, the gray sky reflecting our solemn mood.

Unfortunately she wasn't alone.

Academia soldiers...How on Earth could they be so cruel?

For whatever reason, they thought it would be funny to attack a dead woman, with a fire-based monster, I don't even remember what it was called, and burned the corpse, laughing as if it fell to pieces on the ground. All of us were horrified. The smell of a burning corpse would forever haunt my nightmares. I had to cover my mouth to keep from screaming in horror.

Yuuto, on the other hand, was livid. His fists were balled, his teeth clenched, his eyebrows burrowed so deeply. He stepped out into the open, the anger radiating off of him. I had never seen him like that, being the one who usually avoided a fight where he could.

Now, all of us were even afraid to approach him. To tell him to calm down and to step down. Even Shun, normally the one who would look for a fight, was surprised at Yuuto. He even made an attempt to approach him, but Yuuto held his arm out, instantly activating his Duel Disk. His voice was even gravelly when he spoke, as if it wasn't him there anymore. He took all of them head on, Dark Rebellion screaming in pain when it was eventually summoned. It made me feel sick, seeing Yuuto like this, hearing Dark Rebellion's cries.

Yuuto was merciless on the soldiers. Yuuto, the one normally scolded for being too soft on the enemy, for even giving them too many chances to surrender peacefully, was tearing the soldiers to pieces. For those few minutes the entire duel lasted, Yuuto had become a killer: cold, ruthless, bloodthirsty, unsparing in his wrath.

We only managed to stop him when the duel was long over, when he still attacking soldiers long after they stopped breathing, literally slaughtering them, staining the melting snow with their blood. It was like a scene out of horror movie.

The strange thing was though, when everyone tried to subdue him, he threw them off with an inhuman kind of strength, as if he was possessed.

I was afraid to approach him, to even call his name. Shun even called out to me when I started approaching him, causing him to turn on me. His eyes made my heart stop.

They were glowing, his brows were still furrowed, his mouth in a steady, grim frown. I almost didn't recognize him. His eyebrow rose when he saw me, still having that angry expression and harsh frown, but it momentarily stopped his rampage.

Of course, I did the most sensible thing and ran into his arms, barely able to hold back my tears. I was scared, and I'll admit it was incredibly stupid of me, especially after witnessing him just moments ago throwing off Shun and all the others. I would have been a feather compared to them, all them much bigger than both of us. And Yuuto did struggle when I got hold of him, screaming and growling in animal-like fury, but I refused to let him go. I don't even know what got into me, but I just knew...

Whatever was going on with Yuuto, it couldn't have been all him.

We both tumbled to the ground, soaking ourselves in the bloody snow and mud. I struggled to keep him down, screaming at him to stop, that that was enough. Yuuto wiggled and writhed, trying to free himself. Shun and the others helped to pin him down, calling his name, telling him to calm down, that it's over now.

It felt like hours, holding him down in the mud while he screamed in pain, screaming at all of us to release him. I remember crying as we held him down, my tears freezing on my face, but I refused to let him go. Finally, he eventually ran out of steam and passed out. All of us were breathing hard, our hearts racing after the scene.

I took him back to camp, dragging him the best I could around my shoulders, changed his clothes, tried to keep him as comfortable as I could. Shun had walked off with the others, trying to figure out what to do next. Everyone was worn out by Yuuto's display, and him doing... that, had concerned and frightened all of them. They were still within earshot should I start to scream for help, in case Yuuto woke up like... that.

I had blatantly refused to leave him to die out in the field, against everyone agreeing to do so. Shun had mixed feelings, but he didn't say anything to help either of us.

I had never felt so sick in my life. Yuuto was their friend and companion as much as mine, and they were just going to abandon him like that! I was lucky that they had let me carry him. I fought to keep him with us, against everyone's wishes, and stayed by his side, alone.

And, I've continued to do so, for the past few days now. I've made sure he's stayed warm, keeping a fire going nearby, using rags soaked with snow melt to cool his forehead and neck, holding his hand through the night. He's already done the same for me, back before we had joined Yuuma's group and I had that terrible cough. He had stayed with me that entire time looking after me, not abandoning me, not even once.

Now, I guess it's my turn to look after him, even if it's just me this time. Yuuto wouldn't abandon me, so I won't abandon him.

My persistence finally does pay off. As I'm wiping his face with a cold rag, his eyes finally do open, a little cloudy but back to normal. His voice is hoarse and far off, calling me 'Mom'. It hurt when he looked at me like that, tears starting to form at the corners of his eyes. I didn't have the heart to correct him, not with him looking at me like that.

Unfortunately, he figured it out on his own, his heart visibly sinking when he looked at me.

"I'm so sorry, Ruri," he admonished, his flushed face breaking my heart, "I... I left you alone. Were you okay? Where's Shun?"

He tried to sit up, but groaned in pain. He was covered in bruises, from when all of us had pinned him to the ground. I wanted to cry, seeing him in so much pain, something that didn't escape his notice as I helped him to sit up properly.

And, though it hurt to repeat the last few days to him, I still had to tell him. Finding his mom, what the soldiers did to her...

And, what he did to the soldiers.

I didn't have the heart to tell him about the others starting to distrust him. He had enough to worry about already. Still, he probably figured out, judging by his expression. He doesn't even remember doing such a horrible thing to the soldiers. Just, when he saw the burning corpse, he was just filled with so much rage, so much hatred. It was like he had lost consciousness that very moment, he remembers that little. He looked about ready to cry himself, questioning how he had lost himself like that.

"What even happened with me, Ruri?" He asked, as if I had an answer for him, "I... I was such a monster... how could I have..."

Without another word, I pulled him close, feeling my shoulder becoming wet with his tears. Of all the times I cried on his shoulder, this was the first time he had cried on mine. He clung so tightly to me, his arms almost crushing my ribs. I was afraid of letting him go, however. I felt like he might fall apart if I let him go.

"My mom..." he choked, "she... she always insisted that I stay at your house, whenever I left from school. She was glad when I became friends with you. I told her about you all the time. She wanted so badly to meet you, Ruri, and I wanted you to meet her too. But... it was never safe at my house. That's why I never took you there. My Dad... he wasn't like your dad, or Shun. Or even like Yuuma, definitely not like how Yuuma was. He... he hurt her, Ruri. He hurt her... She insisted that I stay at your house to keep me safe. I could only come home after dark, when he went to work. It was horrible, Ruri. I hated leaving her alone with that man, and yet..."

He hugged me tighter, taking a breath through his sobs.

"I tried so hard to call her after dark, when the Invasion first started. I was so anxious, Ruri. I tried to call her from your house phone so many times while you and Shun were asleep. I even tried all of our D-Gazers, but nothing worked. Not a day went by when I wasn't at least a little worried about her. But I was afraid, Ruri. I know you wanted to find your mom and dad as much I wanted to find my mom, but I was scared of being on my own. That you and Shun would leave me to find your parents, while I was left alone."

I was shocked to hear that. Shun and I would never abandon him, especially for something like that. If he had told us...

Instead of arguing with him, I just continued to comfort him the best I could. Rubbing his back, running my hand through his hair, quietly shushing him when appropriate.

"And, finally finding her like that, after all this time... She had died alone, Ruri! Cold and alone! I wasn't there with her, even in the end! Fuck, Ruri, I couldn't even stop her fucking corpse from being mangled by those Fusion bastards!"

He sobbed harder, choking on his own air, he was crying so hard.

"Why, Ruri... just why?" He said over and over again. Neither of us had an answer. I couldn't even say sorry to him. I had no words that could comfort him. I don't think there were any, not then, and definitely not now. The only thing I could do was hold him as long as I could, rubbing his back and finger-combing his hair until he fell asleep again. I wanted to cry too, seeing how deeply hurt Yuuto was by all of this. He was my best friend, the closest friend I've ever had, yet there wasn't much I could do to ease his suffering.

I feel terrible, not being able to help him in the way I wanted to, easing his sorrows, putting an end to Academia's tyranny, so that he, and everyone, didn't have to suffer anymore. What is it going to take? When is this nightmare going to end? We've had enough, Academia. When will you finally see that you've defeated us utterly? What else do you want from us?


End file.
